Courtesy of the Associated Press
Eric Grimes, pictured, welcomed his son Bertrund into the world yesterday, but not before a long argument with hospital administrators who didn't believe Grimes, 31, was actually the father.
"We thought he was the baby's brother, maybe, but certainly not the father. I mean, he looks 13." Sandy Donaldson, Chief of Staff and Toronto Mercy Hospital explained. "I don't think his voice has even broken. I don't know much about men, but I know he isn't one."
The doctors in obstetrics were also unconvinced that Grimes, a structural engineer, could possibly be the father of the 9 lb. newborn. "I treat kids every day, so I think I have a pretty good grasp on how old a kid looks and how old a kid is. In my professional opinion, Eric can't be over 14. Maybe 15, but even that's a stretch." Dr. Halladay said, visibly curious as to how Grimes was actually more than twice the age he looked. "Moreover, I just can't imagine him consummating his relationship with this woman. Like, is that even legal?"
But the day wasn't bogged down with confusion and mistaken ages for everyone. Mel Grimes, Eric's father was ecstatic. "I'm just happy he knocked up a girl" Grimes Sr. was overheard saying, shaking his head in amazement.
As for the mystery of how Eric stays looking so young, everyone has their own theories. "Maybe the fountain of youth?" suggests Colin Pearson, Grimes' assignment as Best Buddies.
"Wait, you mean he's not 14? I just assumed he came to the office on a Bring-Your-Kid-To-Work day and never left" Explained Hugh Clinton, a colleague of Grimes.
Whatever the answer, Eric seems jovial now. When reached for comment, Grimes, a giant grin on his face declared, "I happy!" before returning to his game of NHL '09.
"We thought he was the baby's brother, maybe, but certainly not the father. I mean, he looks 13." Sandy Donaldson, Chief of Staff and Toronto Mercy Hospital explained. "I don't think his voice has even broken. I don't know much about men, but I know he isn't one."
The doctors in obstetrics were also unconvinced that Grimes, a structural engineer, could possibly be the father of the 9 lb. newborn. "I treat kids every day, so I think I have a pretty good grasp on how old a kid looks and how old a kid is. In my professional opinion, Eric can't be over 14. Maybe 15, but even that's a stretch." Dr. Halladay said, visibly curious as to how Grimes was actually more than twice the age he looked. "Moreover, I just can't imagine him consummating his relationship with this woman. Like, is that even legal?"
But the day wasn't bogged down with confusion and mistaken ages for everyone. Mel Grimes, Eric's father was ecstatic. "I'm just happy he knocked up a girl" Grimes Sr. was overheard saying, shaking his head in amazement.
As for the mystery of how Eric stays looking so young, everyone has their own theories. "Maybe the fountain of youth?" suggests Colin Pearson, Grimes' assignment as Best Buddies.
"Wait, you mean he's not 14? I just assumed he came to the office on a Bring-Your-Kid-To-Work day and never left" Explained Hugh Clinton, a colleague of Grimes.
Whatever the answer, Eric seems jovial now. When reached for comment, Grimes, a giant grin on his face declared, "I happy!" before returning to his game of NHL '09.
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9 comments:
Hahahahha oh wow kitzy you tuned me pretty good in that article. Good photoshopping of that picture too, wow, i dont' even know what to say, i got owned.
-Grimes
"I happy" - Oh man thats good.. Now thats good blog
I happy! It's amazing since in the last 4 years, what with the smoking 4 packs a day and that grizzled old beard, I'd say grimes is well over 31, i'd almost go 40. Isn't that what happened in Mexico?
Hahah yeah when we were in Mexico we had a crwe of young Mexicans guess our ages, they guessed about 35 for me...but at the same time that was the youngest guess of anyone. I think Denby was late 30's, and dug and sackville were in their 40's. And 4 packs a day? c'mon, half tops!
HAHAHA, yeah, that's too true. Actually, Grimes is the only person in the world who calls himself baby face. Everyone else calls him old weathered hobo face. But what can I say, this article was more for him than you chumps.
P.S. i wouldnt name my kid Bertrund. I would put "Na" on his birth certificate. And people would say, "your kid's name is Na?" And i'd say "No that's just his atomic symbol. His actual name is Sodium."
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2233878.ece
Grimes isn't the only child having babies
Yeah, that's actually the hyperlinked article if you click, "Courtesy of the Associated Press"
I do believe that the secret to young looking skin is all in the Semen. Eric has a neverending supply of this wonderless material.. and why would he not use it to his advantage. Fuck... I use it under my eyes on a reg. basis. NO bags.... 25 going on 14! Its the only thing men are really all that good for! Besides sitting on feet when they're cold!
PS.. Congrats!
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